Are wider tires really faster in real life? (25c vs 28c)

We are in agreement, but your description of a “static” environment is a red-herring. The fact is that the only way to change the contact patch size is with pressures (or weight obviously) PSI is all that is supporting the weight. All tyre width does, at the same PSI is change the contact patch shape. You can’t change those physics. Carcass/sidewall compliance is a factor but much more of a concern in car tyre performance). A bigger road bike tire (eg. Continental GP 4000 and GP 5000) provides a lower rolling resistance at the same air pressure due to it’s shorter/wider contact patch - hence it is more comfortable at a 15% tyre drop air pressure. But when you equalise pressures for the same tyre drop, rolling resistance is basically equivalent. Which is not normally understood in the “wider is better” debate.

When you talk about compliance, you are simply stating that lower tyre pressures produce more grip and more compliance, which is obvious. Your wider tyres support more compliance only due to 2 factors, a wider and shorter contact patch, and their ability, within limits, to run at lower pressures.